- walks into chair
- me: sorry
He just seems like he’s amused by everything the other candidates say and that they’re mentally impaired or something idk.
I don’t like him. Or any of them really. They all seem like sleazeballs.
- the world: hey man we've got some really serious problems like global warming and mass economic failure and riots and genocide and aids and cancer and your healthcare system is shit so maybe we should get to work
- US government: sit down I have to stop people from sharing things online
- US government: also pizza is a vegetable
i have this weird self esteem problem where i hate myself yet i still think i’m better than everyone else
I did the Nicki Minaj blink once, it was right before an epileptic seizure.
- Mom: Well if you can support your opinions well then you can be a good debater, you could be a politician, you could be the president even.
- Dad: Naw they're just master debaters.
- Me: omg
- Mom: It's sort of a one-handed job, isn't it?
- Me: omg